Tricky

This thing I have for you
Not too many understand
My devotion to loving you
Is unparalleled
Like a child to its parent
I can't help but
wanting to be held in you

This thing I have for you
Is dense and deep
I can sink myself in another
and get straight to you
I am loving you
when I love the one
I am with

This thing I have for you
It's what beats my heart
I bleed and breathe
my love for you
My body cries out
for your touch
My whole being
calls out only for you

This thing I have for you
in me
I find makes the sweetest kiss
bitter
next to a thought of you
all other thoughts turn to ash
Didn't I say I was devoted
I am
I am in love with you

If I could not walk
my days with you
I would be a traveler
with no where to go
without you
there could be no home
You make comfort
possible

I would open all of me for you
even in my fear
I would stand and face a million arrows
they only lead me back to you
You are my most beloved
and I want to be lost in you

Yet here I am
lost in doubt
cringing in fear
hiding in shame
clothed in guilt
glutted off my mind
lustful with my heart
unable to forgive
myself

But you are still here
loving me through moon light
and laying yourself under my feet
through the falling leaves
The sound of water dripping
is a reminder of all you are
I lift my heart
mind
and soul
to only you

Tricky
it is to have a love
that is both your creator
and your lover
it's tricky
to have my spirit
enclosed in flesh
in order to know
the unknowable
and to meet the only one
that never leaves me

Yet here I am
making supplications
to the very being of my existence
You will always be my first love
Because you first loved me
take these feeble words
as an offering of my devotion
Until I meet you again through his eyes

(c) kalonia jennings 12