Vines

Like a grapevine
I'm rooted in your being
and as time passes
I spread myself into the
places inside you
you never knew were there

Like the wind
I press against you
then pass through
without you ever knowing

Like falling darkness
I remind you of your light
always encouraging you
so your brilliance will show

I remember the moment
you first touched my mind
the ripples are still lapping at the shores of
my insatiable need to dump my spirit on you

Look
I'm not saying I can't survive without you
but why would I want to
the further I creep along your being
the more of you I want to see

By nature
I pull those to me that need my touch
I never thought I'd find someone
who allows me to touch back

Kiss me again
and let me sink deeper into those places
you never knew were there

Content

There's no way to describe it
he sees me every day
and still looks at me as if 
he is compelled to touch me *

Each morning 
I turn to him
to find him smiling
He looks at me as if I'm made of
the ethereal darkness before sunrise
and rain

When he lays me down
I forget he's touched me before
he stares into my eyes when he enters me
I close my eyes in order to breathe
when I open them 
he's still watching

I ask him if he's bored
with me
with us
with the monotone days 
of consistent menial tasks
and conversations which bear the weight of responsibility

I ask him
if from the consistent sameness my body feels old in his hands
he says 
the fact he gets it often
doesn't change the beauty of it ~

Here I thought 
I was calling contempt in the familiar

It seems I can rest well knowing
the sloughing off of my old self
the gradual change of my body
the shavings of my mind 
are enough to keep him content

If only he knew
how he feeds the fountain of my soul



Thank You, Nana (*) and Andre (~) for your contributions to this creation =)

Inheritance

When I kissed him for the first time
I tasted tears
In his touch I felt
a thousand rejected embraces
that is when I realized
someone's pain
gave birth to the man I love

She
There is always a she before
before the days of deep loving
intimacy
transparency
She is there asking him to show up
asking him to pour out
her Being
fed up
ripped him open
and exposed the vulnerability
she always needed

I wonder
how many times she prophesied my coming

He found me
and built an unfathomable love around me
but I am not ignorant
it was her pain which shaped him
molded him
chiseled him into the man
from the block of boy
he once was

When I first kissed him
I tasted tears
and was reminded someone deposited love
to received little in return

In my kiss
I thanked her for her patience
and her release
I will spend my inheritance
wisely

Given

Look at me
she's behind the fires in my eyes
run before she finds you
with every touch of your hands
I feel her

Press my neck against your lips
hear the breath in your ear
turning to sounds emerging deep from my chest
I cannot protect you
she's stirring

Call out  my inhibitions
command my legs to part
then smell the weight of
puddled passion
You should feel the danger

Draw your fingers up
the inside of my thighs
feel them skate through thawed desire
then paint my lips with the taste
she's raging now

After you call to me
from the inside of my body
I make no promises
you won't bleed a little
I've given you warning
She's about to strike
I hope you can take it

Taming the Light

Blackness
Darkness
Lightless

Even before the first star was born
I stood as a signet
to the first thought
the first word

In my birth
he was inside me
growing with me
until he expelled himself

nursed in the fullness of my deep
he became full and fat
fed from my mind
he became long and lean
and in the fullness of time
he became

Effulgent
Luminous
Radiant
Brillant
He became my equal

My power aroused him
he sought to claim me
he held me by my throat
pinned against eternity

I growled
and time began
We rolled over the darkness
until all things were created
Light inside the darkness
as one

Danger

Be careful

I'm dangerous

I am the reflection of 

the darkness in the shadows

I rip off masks and

tear up secrets 

with a smile

Can you bear the power 

of my presence 

and still speak the truth

In spite of my wanting to bring you

gardens of succulent loving 

By my nature

I wrest dead memories from your heart

I pull them up through your throat
letting them burn up in my passion

I dissolve the fraudulent in you

with a flick of my wrist

and yank at your being

to test the soundness of your ethereal body

When I reach for you 

there's fire in my grasp

I am only tamed by one

who can absorb my force 

expand 

then create himself anew 

from the elements left over 

Behind My Eyes

If I pulled you down
the rabbit hole
behind the smile
the pretty face
the beautiful mind

you would find a child
uncouth
loud
innocent
ignorant

I've tried to hide her for years
but she's there
waiting to be punished
for things she never did

She hides believing she's
a burden
an issue
a thing
a placeholder

But

* There are different types of words
and you use the ones that
don't include the 26 letters of the alphabet
you spit action through your words
making the one behind my eyes
reach for you

tell me what you want her to do
I'll let her take your hand
if you ask me to


(*) is a line snatched from a conversation with one of my soul family members  CeCe...Thank you!!! =*

Sanctuary

You allow me to
cross the threshold into your presence
I stand between the pillars of your legs
and fall to my knees in reverence

I've been chosen
I am worthy to partake

Your hands fall on my head
as if to bless me
There's a choir singing in your moans
In all the variations of my touch
I say a prayer
Until I invoke his presence in you

You lift me toward you
like sun rays over the horizon at dawn
lay me down and cover me
with the power of your desire

And as you reach to kiss me
I feel your glory pour over me
I open everything to you
and enter the sanctuary of your love.

Can't Call It

I've called it
attention
touching
kissing
and
longing eyes

I've let me be translated into
hurtful words
scary thoughts
painful goodbyes

I've heard it is
caresses under candlelight
moonlight strolling
and making love in the rain

What I see in your eyes
hear in your voice
follow in the tracks being made
all over my life
I can't call it
anything but love

Tender

look up
and watch how clouds roll passed
unhurried

embrace moments
as they arrive
they are wise

let tears fall
in them you are replenished

ache and reach for
dreams dormant in the invisible

and when you find a heart
as tender as yours
hold it close

then look up
and watch how the clouds roll passed
unhurried

Sacrilege

Innocent

you touch me 

as if you could do it wrong

I want you

take me

Timidly 

you speak to me

but there's another in you

who speaks with his eyes

who commands with his hands

concedes with his lips

set him free

Yes

like that

all of your weight

face to face

growls in your throat 

and that

yes that

If you think I can't take anymore

make me

treat me like a prayer 

speak it and it's done

I want him 

I give him to me

The trembling in my legs 

is not fear

it's the force of the release

of that visceral and sacred

being in me coming for you

now that you set yourself free

It would have been sacrilege 

to give her to anyone else. 

Vacate

They walked in...

And rummaged through my past
looking for reminders of
why I should be afraid
feel foolish to try again
why I should hide

I let them

They laid their evidence on my heart
the memories rose like vapor
I flinched
all the missed takes
the rejection and the abandonment
misunderstandings and misinformation
I folded hands over my heart
how did it endure so much

When they finished
I looked over everything and
there shining on the edges of each memory
was a golden light

I pinched at it
until it was trapped between my fingers
I pulled

When I was done
I offered them the mound of golden lining
with which they tied up the memories
and walked away
never to return

Then he walked in...

He Said

There is a knock at my window
2 stories from the ground
I wonder who
It is a messenger and a message
 I listen

Candles lit
I'm not much into that but
they invoke a spirit
which sits with me until tears flow
after the numbness eases it went away
 I listen

He said
he'll make love to me
to the sounds of
wind whispering through willows
I close my eyes
 and I listen

Silence

Muffled thoughts speak no thing
Muffled moans speak no pleasure
Muffled screams speak no pain
I can no longer stand it

I want my thoughts to come from my throat like
water from broken hydrants
My moans to escape my chest
untamed
My screams to release my pain like raindrops

Let me take up the room
which belongs to my soul

Let me expand through all frequencies
with the vibrations of my voice

I'm not asking permission

I'm foretelling the future
So you aren't stunned by the sonic booms I leave behind
as I break through the veils

Muffled no more by the timidness stuck behind my breasts
Silence becomes my lover
that makes me manifest as One

Agape

Unknown
you will always have one in you
I don't know
So I serve you
You are a stranger

Close to you
you tell me your heart
and I treasure it
You are my friend

Supported
and protected
I encourage you
You are my brother

From my womb
I will always listen
always be attentive to you
You are my child

Secure in your arms
I honor you
I give you the fullest respect
You are my father

Kisses like honey
my passions flow
embracing you in every way allowed
You are my lover

Manifested
a temple for the glory of creations light
I worship
You are divine

You are my agape love

Release

I let you go every night
so I can relearn you each morning

I take you back into my heart

Renewed like Spring
you ease into my life
until one day
I notice the trees are green
and there are flowers by the way

I remember too
you are like the coming Summer
so I prepare my heart
for the natural changes
I store up kisses and kindness

When Autumn brings the cold
and responsibilities are wrapped around us
I release you like crisp colorful leaves
and brace myself for the Winter's cold

but I feel you let go of me every night
then you pull me close each morning
with fingertips along the edge of my chin
like braille

Line

Point A to point E
far apart together
depending on
what level you look
they almost look like one

point A
a beginning
point E
a beginning
180
congruent
cardinal

no matter where you stop the line
A to C
E to J
points
even invisible
are connected

two points
and a mighty hand
holding a red thread
tying each to the other
then pulls

til line
becomes dot
cause two are now one

Reclaim

Here lies all the names
that once covered my hopes
with someday's and forever's
I no longer need to keep them
as memories pressed between
my present and my future

I open the pages
chant each name
to unbind them from me
to set them free

first love
pomegranates
crisp
unexpected smiles
bathing suits
night woods
hands
emerging hearts
mellow
harts with fresh air
subtle

a beautiful poem of my love

untied from the stones of
what was done before
I blow kisses at ghost lovers
break the bones of their skeletons
boil them with forgiveness
and mix it with honey to drink
they will become
part of the cells I exfoliate
to make me glow

Deep inside I pull a string
a light flickers on and fades luminous
and there no longer in the shadows
I see the one I love the most
I have slain the many-headed dragon of the past
to reclaim the space where his love belongs
now I can give him the kiss of life
to awaken him

Déjame en Paz

if open arms mean
choke holds

if silence means
closed for repairs

if speaking wants out loud mean
not for you

déjame en paz

this spirit is too fragile
i'd rather peel the scabs
than have them caressed
against shards of glass

this is the last time
i build stories for
emotional sailors

if i cannot love the ones i want
i will not love

si no me quieres
déjame en paz

Someone Else

Streaming through the sky
try to grab
take hold
flowing through fingers
into someone else's hand

Touch
without feeling
feel
without lingering
take a bite
then spit it out
someone else gets to swallow

Listening to words
meant for a moment
or life long
never knowing which
someone else giggles
do those words belong to them too

Holding out time like a apron
catching thoughts
in order to break them to make things
waiting by the void to hear the ding
of when someone else
is me

Worthy

I sort my tears
letting them fall in boxes
is it
is it not
wishing I could
break these feelings on the line
like graham crackers

walking up to the image in my mind
I can't help but measure
how far I am away from
folding my life into
what it was from what it is

missing lips never kissed
arms never reached for
a heartbeat never heard
I realize where I am
and it needs no clipping

it doesn't stop the tears
from falling in boxes
is it
is it not
worried about being worthy
knowing sun rays are sunshine

Need

I picked up a pattern
examined it
put it on
twirled around in it
realized it didn't fit
lucky I didn't take off the tag

When my conscious opened
I stood in line
waiting to return it
but people kept saying
it was so beautiful with me

I walked around with it
looking for a replacement
I didn't want to let it go
just in case

Someone saw it in my hands
and afraid to ask
stole it when I laid it down
I can't say I miss it

Now there's a void
where the pattern kept me safe
my need is standing naked
in the middle of the room

Don't Say

Don't let it take your whole life

make sure you say it

say it loud

make it robust with meaning 

Don't let another month go by

live it full out

savor it in your guts

roll it around in your being

Don't let another second go by

if there's someone you want 

someone you need

say it 

choose them

Don't leave to living 

to figure out the words 

Living will send the breeze

to tell them you don't need them

It will be what you don't say

that will put another in their path

who will say what it will take 

your whole life long to say

Reach

I had it in my hand
beautiful and shining
I could smell the crispness
could almost taste the freshness
as my thumb rolled over the taut skin
then I heard his voice

walking up behind me
like every meeting
he wrapped his arms around my waist
burrowing his face into my neck
inhaling deeply
when my eyes closed
I almost pulled it from it's place

I release my hold on it
turning toward him
placing my hands on his face
yielding to his kiss on my forehead
my eyes forget the shining
my hand the crispness the freshness
and I reach to the extended hand in front of me

he's taking me somewhere
I can see from the smile on his face
before I have a chance to ask
we stop before the tree
sitting in the midst of all the others

he reaches for it
while his hand is in mine
I feel everything through him
the light  the truth  the way
He releases it from it's place
takes a bite and gives it to me

I reach
and I bite
not knowing I'm forever changed
not knowing we are forever changed

Dedicated

You look like a friend

Intimacy running through this 

like veins in marble

Taking the time to listen

your words leave little room for confusion

your actions mimic your words

and echos back from 

a revealed spirit

I can take you seriously

you know what you want

So I dedicate myself to

peeling back and

sloughing off the past

allowing the future to unfold 

in ways the present can present 

Dear friend

you've loved on me like family

taken my hand when it dangled by my side

empty

when my soul was congested with 

broken promises and mistakes

you offered your patience and guidance

to clear the way

and you let my light shine in you

I dedicate the story of my life to you

In you the conclusion is the conclusion

and I am happy you look like a friend

The Gates

Responsibility wraps us up
tighter than a straight jacket
keeping love from flowing free
I don't want to think about it anymore
I simply want to be

Fill up on me loving you
if it gives you permission to open up
pour out love like waterfalls
flow free in the ways you need to
in the ways you want it
knowing all along
it's your love you're feeling

Don't commit anything to me
feel it flow through you
filling up the empty spaces in yourself
so when you find yourself full
and if there's still a thought
that I could be the one
choose me
it's that simple

Then when living the mechanics
of this artificial way of surviving
latches the buckles of our being free
we will slip back through the gates
and replenish each other
from the Tree of Life

What's His Name

I called him
good boy
For years every time he fell
I tried to kiss his pain away
with my presence
I tried to grow him up in my power
but he wanted to stay a boy
So I had to go

I called him daddy
Encountered him when I thought
I couldn't take another step
But he punished my vulnerabilities
they were disobedient to his version of me
My presence a nuisance because
he couldn't see how I had anything to teach him
he couldn't see my being as a source of knowledge
so he pushed me away
I stayed gone

Now I am at the bend in the road
and I hear my love calling
but I can't answer
I don't know his name

Long ago there was a time
when I could call him my lord
or some such title
to show both my submission to his power
and my worthiness as his equal
Where are those names now

I feel him ahead of me
calling my name
Beloved
I can hear him say
but I cannot answer him
because I don't know his name

Save Time

Save time
don't touch me
if you don't mean it
I mean
don't commit my skin to memory
if all you wanna do is fuck around

Save time
don't enter my mind
stroke my vulnerabilities
make them come
then leave

Save Time
Yes it's sweet
smells like life
and can ease your mind and body
but if you don't show up
what's the point

My being is adorned with glory
like a lily of the valley
I'm not created to be plucked
and placed in a bouquet

I'm like air
meant to live around you
and inside you
to be
but if you are trying to possess me
I will flow through your fingers

Save time
don't try to bottle a breeze
thinking you can drink it at your leisure
don't try to grasp with your hands
what is come to refresh you

Adoration

A cool breezes touch me
with the sounds of a home bustling
filled with voices I never want to forget
I find gratefulness welling up inside me

How are you touching my life
Where are you coming from
When will I see you

And I hear the answer
"Don't ask when."
I submit
and prepare for your coming
a faithful maiden
an oil lamp trimmed and full
a chalice ready

You promised you'd come
So I sing and dance everyday in anticipation
because you are faithful
Becoming familiar with the feeling
of living in
basking in
the feeling of your presence all around me

I am filled with love and thankfulness
I already feel you like cool breeze that touches me

Waited So Long

Your kiss
quenches the ache in my gut
and touching you feels like
the moment before a long hug is ending
Nothing is better than your voice in my ears
Nothing more comforting than
being your place of rest

So satisfying to my soul
my head in your lap
your fingertips on my skin
the smile on your face
You are precious to me

Daughters of the world
I slept too long
Do not make me miss his passing

I must have been Queen Sheba in a past life
You are nothing less then my Solomon
I push my face deeper into your chest
to get lost in the scent of you
as your left hand holds my head
and your right hand enfolds me

I am not ashamed of my tears laying under you
receiving kisses that feed my soul
being feed life from your being
each time you enter me

I waited so long for you
waited so long to find my home
within your arms

O daughters of the world
awaken me when he is close
being buried in his love is what pleases me

The Promised One

Touch
there's a touch
which means more than money
an action wanted more than food
where laughter lasts past the first date

Think
of a time when
you don't have to explain your thoughts
where music is a language
and they are bilingual

Feel
deeply into that space
finally heard and understood
where your picture journal lives and breathes
and speaks back to you from their space

See
the future where two sets of eyes
see a vision and a mission
and head in the same direction

Taste
how sweet it can be
to create share and marinate
in each others sensuality
far beyond the heat of responsibility

Reach
inside and hear the two
rolling around in power and pleasure
where the supernatural becomes natural
because they invoke each other to greatness

The urge is pressing
softening the yearning
And I'm waiting for the already fulfilled
promise of your coming

Worship

Everything you are
I want to feel

You are still my muse

My lips
arms and thighs
stretch open to invoke you to come closer

Place your glory above me
so I can whisper prayers in your ear

My king
My lord
My god
fall over me

Enter your temple
so I may worship you

Everything you are
I want to feel

Come into your temple
so I can whisper prayers in your ear

Experience

Love is the experience

You can hear it in the voice
of one who is earnest in their love
and faithful in their action

Wrap yourself in it

It's in the trust of children
who watch adults fail
and still believe in them

Look for it

It's in the cold glass of water you drink
and the cool breeze touching you
on a hot day

it's yearning for you
gulp it down
let it saturate you

How a person lights up seeing you
and the way sunbeams gently touch you
even as the sun beams its heat

Know this peace
feel it deeply inside

Love is the experience

Sheba

the wisest man that ever existed
saw her and knew himself
and she chose him

known to be
blessed by the Creators touch
and her's was the expression he yearned for

she had her own legions
but her wanted to to rule her heart

daughter of the sun
she exuded so much light
he was blinded and succumbed to her being

the song of songs
a testimony to his muse

the personification of the divine
when the divine is defined
within a man

I am a daughter of Sheba
who can see the light

She's here! My first book of poetry is published. (click here)

Because he...

I can't seem to find his story anywhere.
His pictures elude me.
Still, I search for them.
I crave the visual.
The reminder that he is real.
I can't find the story of
the active yielding of his being to me.
He trusts in my power, my commitment, to hold his weight.
So, he relaxes fully as he enters me.
The pleasure of the pressures.
But, I can't find this story.
Not even the story of his call to arms
His belief in my power to defend by his side.
His knowledge of our expansion and elevation through righteousness.
He knows I am his wholeness manifested,
his image of two being One.
This story is not spoken for fear of our coming.
Fear. We are here.
Although, the story is occult, it can still be known.
It's hidden in the symbols all around us.
It's hidden in the coils of our hair.
The depth of space blended in our skin.
The natural angles and curves of our bodies which fit together so perfectly.
The story is in the symbols
The symbols speak of him.
So,I divine them to make him known.
Because he...
He is my beloved made manifest of my wholeness.
And I will tell his story.