Farewell

Funny how things never turn out how you think. I break a little. I break little pieces off myself and hand them over to void. I rest knowing that nothing makes sense inside my mind. I'm weak from the racing memories. They often make me trip over things that matter.

Falling in love is supposed to feel good. It does, but looking up laying on my back, I'm missing visions of things that were to come. Now, what have I fallen into? This is not love. This is a thought gone malignant, spreading like shrapnel.

Separation means we don't really touch each other. Then why are you always here, touching me? Do you feel me? Do you feel me at all? Or am I just enough to fill the spaces in your life? The gaps of quiet you dare not listen to? It's silly of me to ask you this, this isn't real love. This is something in between it.

Stupid me. Foolish, simple, silly me.  I missed you today. I took a vacation from my troubles and missed my appointment with destiny. So, I am roaming around this foreign place called my life. I said I wanted to travel with you, I just thought it would cost something. I guess it did, it cost me a dream.

Whenever "ever"  comes close enough for me to grasp. I will tell it the story of us. I will tell it of the hope and faith that leaked through a heart that couldn't watch itself bleed. I will tell it of the tears you never wiped away. I will tell it of the truth I never heard you speak, but always implied. I hope you are resting deeply when I say farewell. I have never been good at goodbyes.