Can't Call It

I've called it
attention
touching
kissing
and
longing eyes

I've let me be translated into
hurtful words
scary thoughts
painful goodbyes

I've heard it is
caresses under candlelight
moonlight strolling
and making love in the rain

What I see in your eyes
hear in your voice
follow in the tracks being made
all over my life
I can't call it
anything but love

Tender

look up
and watch how clouds roll passed
unhurried

embrace moments
as they arrive
they are wise

let tears fall
in them you are replenished

ache and reach for
dreams dormant in the invisible

and when you find a heart
as tender as yours
hold it close

then look up
and watch how the clouds roll passed
unhurried

Agape

Unknown
you will always have one in you
I don't know
So I serve you
You are a stranger

Close to you
you tell me your heart
and I treasure it
You are my friend

Supported
and protected
I encourage you
You are my brother

From my womb
I will always listen
always be attentive to you
You are my child

Secure in your arms
I honor you
I give you the fullest respect
You are my father

Kisses like honey
my passions flow
embracing you in every way allowed
You are my lover

Manifested
a temple for the glory of creations light
I worship
You are divine

You are my agape love

Déjame en Paz

if open arms mean
choke holds

if silence means
closed for repairs

if speaking wants out loud mean
not for you

déjame en paz

this spirit is too fragile
i'd rather peel the scabs
than have them caressed
against shards of glass

this is the last time
i build stories for
emotional sailors

if i cannot love the ones i want
i will not love

si no me quieres
déjame en paz

Need

I picked up a pattern
examined it
put it on
twirled around in it
realized it didn't fit
lucky I didn't take off the tag

When my conscious opened
I stood in line
waiting to return it
but people kept saying
it was so beautiful with me

I walked around with it
looking for a replacement
I didn't want to let it go
just in case

Someone saw it in my hands
and afraid to ask
stole it when I laid it down
I can't say I miss it

Now there's a void
where the pattern kept me safe
my need is standing naked
in the middle of the room

The Gates

Responsibility wraps us up
tighter than a straight jacket
keeping love from flowing free
I don't want to think about it anymore
I simply want to be

Fill up on me loving you
if it gives you permission to open up
pour out love like waterfalls
flow free in the ways you need to
in the ways you want it
knowing all along
it's your love you're feeling

Don't commit anything to me
feel it flow through you
filling up the empty spaces in yourself
so when you find yourself full
and if there's still a thought
that I could be the one
choose me
it's that simple

Then when living the mechanics
of this artificial way of surviving
latches the buckles of our being free
we will slip back through the gates
and replenish each other
from the Tree of Life

Switch

I told myself to gather together
as many old inner dirty things
I lined them up
I thought allowing them to be beaten
by the cruelty in someone else
would make them give up
It didn't

So I tried to exchange them
for some ideas of ideals
of a future me
evolved from a present me
I can't step into yet

I thought letting myself
gather together some more words
to bind the lazy things would
create a will power made of iron
but the lazy things wilted and died
the ground they occupied fallowed
that's what I get

Again I exchanged them
with an idea of the truth
peeled words away
to take away the meaning
so I could learn again
a full grown tree broke ground in me
I never thought to answer
a full grown chicken came out an egg

Now it's time to switch
to a definition of living
I can live with

Say Love

You say you love
I ask
have you drained the
lake of tears
you created in ignorance

You say you love
I say
go and recover the secrets
of your geometry
tell me the givens
show me the patterns

You say you love
I see
my inability to conform
to the pictures you create for me
my being's too large
it's busting the seams

I say I love
you hear
and before dawn
you become a misty memory
floating away on the dew
adding to the lake of tears

Mirrors

fun house thoughts
keep me distorted in my own eyes
other people's words
judgement of being
appearances of reality
I keep laying myself naked
to people who judge my fingerprints
as broken

these other figures
rip me at with imaginings
that what I am is not enough
for myself
let alone Life
I keep agreeing
because I think them
more trained to partner Life
when Life obligated Itself to my dance card too

labels and boxes
stickers with descriptions
of being only what they say is
I scratch at the reflections
blood streaks my face
that's when I understood

the words
the thoughts
the collections of distortions
are me screaming at myself
my attacks on others for my sins
my beliefs of who I am deep down
my resistance to the stories steaming
from the maladjusted psychopathic
collective thinking
I keep nodding
I keep agreeing

then someone came along
grabbing my hand
image just as distorted
I looked at them
seeing light encased in stories
and through their eyes I recognized
myself as one of the distortions
pretending to be the real thing

the mirrors cracked and crashed
and without border and boundary
the Light dances and sings to eternity
and merrily down the stream we go

Frustration

Push.
Push!
Push!!!!

My arms are limp
my face is swollen
my body aches
I'm weak

I'm weak in all the ways a person can be
and darkness is so warm
it keeps me safe from the prying minds
who want to know but don't even care

The darkness says comforting things like
sleep
don't think
that's important but don't worry about it
but it whispers
you will never rest
I will be your thoughts forever never ending
watch it all fall apart, it's your fault

My arms are limp
my face is swollen
my body aches
I'm weak
because I can't seem to
push through these frustrations and fears
I can't give birth to these dreams