Behind My Eyes

If I pulled you down
the rabbit hole
behind the smile
the pretty face
the beautiful mind

you would find a child
uncouth
loud
innocent
ignorant

I've tried to hide her for years
but she's there
waiting to be punished
for things she never did

She hides believing she's
a burden
an issue
a thing
a placeholder

But

* There are different types of words
and you use the ones that
don't include the 26 letters of the alphabet
you spit action through your words
making the one behind my eyes
reach for you

tell me what you want her to do
I'll let her take your hand
if you ask me to


(*) is a line snatched from a conversation with one of my soul family members  CeCe...Thank you!!! =*

Sanctuary

You allow me to
cross the threshold into your presence
I stand between the pillars of your legs
and fall to my knees in reverence

I've been chosen
I am worthy to partake

Your hands fall on my head
as if to bless me
There's a choir singing in your moans
In all the variations of my touch
I say a prayer
Until I invoke his presence in you

You lift me toward you
like sun rays over the horizon at dawn
lay me down and cover me
with the power of your desire

And as you reach to kiss me
I feel your glory pour over me
I open everything to you
and enter the sanctuary of your love.

Tender

look up
and watch how clouds roll passed
unhurried

embrace moments
as they arrive
they are wise

let tears fall
in them you are replenished

ache and reach for
dreams dormant in the invisible

and when you find a heart
as tender as yours
hold it close

then look up
and watch how the clouds roll passed
unhurried

Silence

Muffled thoughts speak no thing
Muffled moans speak no pleasure
Muffled screams speak no pain
I can no longer stand it

I want my thoughts to come from my throat like
water from broken hydrants
My moans to escape my chest
untamed
My screams to release my pain like raindrops

Let me take up the room
which belongs to my soul

Let me expand through all frequencies
with the vibrations of my voice

I'm not asking permission

I'm foretelling the future
So you aren't stunned by the sonic booms I leave behind
as I break through the veils

Muffled no more by the timidness stuck behind my breasts
Silence becomes my lover
that makes me manifest as One

Agape

Unknown
you will always have one in you
I don't know
So I serve you
You are a stranger

Close to you
you tell me your heart
and I treasure it
You are my friend

Supported
and protected
I encourage you
You are my brother

From my womb
I will always listen
always be attentive to you
You are my child

Secure in your arms
I honor you
I give you the fullest respect
You are my father

Kisses like honey
my passions flow
embracing you in every way allowed
You are my lover

Manifested
a temple for the glory of creations light
I worship
You are divine

You are my agape love

Release

I let you go every night
so I can relearn you each morning

I take you back into my heart

Renewed like Spring
you ease into my life
until one day
I notice the trees are green
and there are flowers by the way

I remember too
you are like the coming Summer
so I prepare my heart
for the natural changes
I store up kisses and kindness

When Autumn brings the cold
and responsibilities are wrapped around us
I release you like crisp colorful leaves
and brace myself for the Winter's cold

but I feel you let go of me every night
then you pull me close each morning
with fingertips along the edge of my chin
like braille

Someone Else

Streaming through the sky
try to grab
take hold
flowing through fingers
into someone else's hand

Touch
without feeling
feel
without lingering
take a bite
then spit it out
someone else gets to swallow

Listening to words
meant for a moment
or life long
never knowing which
someone else giggles
do those words belong to them too

Holding out time like a apron
catching thoughts
in order to break them to make things
waiting by the void to hear the ding
of when someone else
is me

Worthy

I sort my tears
letting them fall in boxes
is it
is it not
wishing I could
break these feelings on the line
like graham crackers

walking up to the image in my mind
I can't help but measure
how far I am away from
folding my life into
what it was from what it is

missing lips never kissed
arms never reached for
a heartbeat never heard
I realize where I am
and it needs no clipping

it doesn't stop the tears
from falling in boxes
is it
is it not
worried about being worthy
knowing sun rays are sunshine

Need

I picked up a pattern
examined it
put it on
twirled around in it
realized it didn't fit
lucky I didn't take off the tag

When my conscious opened
I stood in line
waiting to return it
but people kept saying
it was so beautiful with me

I walked around with it
looking for a replacement
I didn't want to let it go
just in case

Someone saw it in my hands
and afraid to ask
stole it when I laid it down
I can't say I miss it

Now there's a void
where the pattern kept me safe
my need is standing naked
in the middle of the room

Reach

I had it in my hand
beautiful and shining
I could smell the crispness
could almost taste the freshness
as my thumb rolled over the taut skin
then I heard his voice

walking up behind me
like every meeting
he wrapped his arms around my waist
burrowing his face into my neck
inhaling deeply
when my eyes closed
I almost pulled it from it's place

I release my hold on it
turning toward him
placing my hands on his face
yielding to his kiss on my forehead
my eyes forget the shining
my hand the crispness the freshness
and I reach to the extended hand in front of me

he's taking me somewhere
I can see from the smile on his face
before I have a chance to ask
we stop before the tree
sitting in the midst of all the others

he reaches for it
while his hand is in mine
I feel everything through him
the light  the truth  the way
He releases it from it's place
takes a bite and gives it to me

I reach
and I bite
not knowing I'm forever changed
not knowing we are forever changed

Dedicated

You look like a friend

Intimacy running through this 

like veins in marble

Taking the time to listen

your words leave little room for confusion

your actions mimic your words

and echos back from 

a revealed spirit

I can take you seriously

you know what you want

So I dedicate myself to

peeling back and

sloughing off the past

allowing the future to unfold 

in ways the present can present 

Dear friend

you've loved on me like family

taken my hand when it dangled by my side

empty

when my soul was congested with 

broken promises and mistakes

you offered your patience and guidance

to clear the way

and you let my light shine in you

I dedicate the story of my life to you

In you the conclusion is the conclusion

and I am happy you look like a friend

The Gates

Responsibility wraps us up
tighter than a straight jacket
keeping love from flowing free
I don't want to think about it anymore
I simply want to be

Fill up on me loving you
if it gives you permission to open up
pour out love like waterfalls
flow free in the ways you need to
in the ways you want it
knowing all along
it's your love you're feeling

Don't commit anything to me
feel it flow through you
filling up the empty spaces in yourself
so when you find yourself full
and if there's still a thought
that I could be the one
choose me
it's that simple

Then when living the mechanics
of this artificial way of surviving
latches the buckles of our being free
we will slip back through the gates
and replenish each other
from the Tree of Life

Adoration

A cool breezes touch me
with the sounds of a home bustling
filled with voices I never want to forget
I find gratefulness welling up inside me

How are you touching my life
Where are you coming from
When will I see you

And I hear the answer
"Don't ask when."
I submit
and prepare for your coming
a faithful maiden
an oil lamp trimmed and full
a chalice ready

You promised you'd come
So I sing and dance everyday in anticipation
because you are faithful
Becoming familiar with the feeling
of living in
basking in
the feeling of your presence all around me

I am filled with love and thankfulness
I already feel you like cool breeze that touches me

The Promised One

Touch
there's a touch
which means more than money
an action wanted more than food
where laughter lasts past the first date

Think
of a time when
you don't have to explain your thoughts
where music is a language
and they are bilingual

Feel
deeply into that space
finally heard and understood
where your picture journal lives and breathes
and speaks back to you from their space

See
the future where two sets of eyes
see a vision and a mission
and head in the same direction

Taste
how sweet it can be
to create share and marinate
in each others sensuality
far beyond the heat of responsibility

Reach
inside and hear the two
rolling around in power and pleasure
where the supernatural becomes natural
because they invoke each other to greatness

The urge is pressing
softening the yearning
And I'm waiting for the already fulfilled
promise of your coming

Experience

Love is the experience

You can hear it in the voice
of one who is earnest in their love
and faithful in their action

Wrap yourself in it

It's in the trust of children
who watch adults fail
and still believe in them

Look for it

It's in the cold glass of water you drink
and the cool breeze touching you
on a hot day

it's yearning for you
gulp it down
let it saturate you

How a person lights up seeing you
and the way sunbeams gently touch you
even as the sun beams its heat

Know this peace
feel it deeply inside

Love is the experience

Sheba

the wisest man that ever existed
saw her and knew himself
and she chose him

known to be
blessed by the Creators touch
and her's was the expression he yearned for

she had her own legions
but her wanted to to rule her heart

daughter of the sun
she exuded so much light
he was blinded and succumbed to her being

the song of songs
a testimony to his muse

the personification of the divine
when the divine is defined
within a man

I am a daughter of Sheba
who can see the light

Because he...

I can't seem to find his story anywhere.
His pictures elude me.
Still, I search for them.
I crave the visual.
The reminder that he is real.
I can't find the story of
the active yielding of his being to me.
He trusts in my power, my commitment, to hold his weight.
So, he relaxes fully as he enters me.
The pleasure of the pressures.
But, I can't find this story.
Not even the story of his call to arms
His belief in my power to defend by his side.
His knowledge of our expansion and elevation through righteousness.
He knows I am his wholeness manifested,
his image of two being One.
This story is not spoken for fear of our coming.
Fear. We are here.
Although, the story is occult, it can still be known.
It's hidden in the symbols all around us.
It's hidden in the coils of our hair.
The depth of space blended in our skin.
The natural angles and curves of our bodies which fit together so perfectly.
The story is in the symbols
The symbols speak of him.
So,I divine them to make him known.
Because he...
He is my beloved made manifest of my wholeness.
And I will tell his story.