Need

I picked up a pattern
examined it
put it on
twirled around in it
realized it didn't fit
lucky I didn't take off the tag

When my conscious opened
I stood in line
waiting to return it
but people kept saying
it was so beautiful with me

I walked around with it
looking for a replacement
I didn't want to let it go
just in case

Someone saw it in my hands
and afraid to ask
stole it when I laid it down
I can't say I miss it

Now there's a void
where the pattern kept me safe
my need is standing naked
in the middle of the room

Interested

I wonder if you heard his voice, would something shift in you, too. There's something harmonious in it. His face is magnetic, it draws the eyes and they relax there from the strain of searching. I soon found myself brimming, one more laugh or syllable, could send me over in slow moving rivulets.

I tried to devour his ideas. They were sifted through the best minds and, somehow, seemed truly original. 

There's something to the turning of his mind which caused me to fold over in myself. I was trying to dial a woman in myself to meet him. Then figured out, I was already all of her. I stopped dialing.

Somewhere in it, I got to experience his touch. It made me remember those times when I thought I looked damn fine. It came without censorship, all of me was welcomed.  If only I could take back my first touch, though. I remember the symmetry of his shoulders. I remember his kiss on my third eye, it's still blinking in response.  

I just forgot to ask enough questions. Thinking I would run out of me, I forgot to draw out the between essence. The essence between suffered from the twisted words and thoughts bound in their own limits. Reactions, so well worked-out, conditioned by people we both could not unravel our true selves from. 

I couldn't show I was attached, it would be too much. I couldn't show the fear of chipping off his being from mine like nail polish. 

Now, I know what it means to be interested, to be curious and fearless. I know what it means to investigate someone, not for my benefit or enhancement. I can feel the depths of what it means to know someone, wanting to know what the silence between words are saying. The inextinguishable being inside of both of us that we share. I'm interested in knowing who you are, because of him. 

Brotha

I'll never call you daddy
you could never be second best
a divine mind
love of a lifetime
my love given to no one less

you're driving through my veins
pure quality
mainlined everything about you
through time
waited until timelines
crossed like times
I'm gonna give my best

Closer than a brotha
like my own kin
whole-soul'd
this kinda of love
can only begin within

Closer than a friend
my witness
two as one
when you're blessed by the son
this kinda of love
can only begin within

Weakness
your love hits me
bending me
upward
supple our kisses
potent
enough to set this world on fire

Closer than a brotha
like my own kin
whole-soul'd
this kinda love
can only begin within
I feel safe within our love

I could sing about the stars
as your cradle
the moon a spotlight just for you
but our love makes it impossible
to think of us as two

Infinite
our love has been through time
that's why I remember you
we come back to this place to remember
no matter, whatever, we are never through
Cause you are

Closer than a brotha
like my own kin
whole-soul'd
this kinda love
can only begin within

Newborn

My skin feels like

all the nerves are poking out 

grated and sprinkled with salt

I thought after awhile

I could keep hiding 

I could keep looking under rocks
thinking I would be there

There is nothing in between 

me and I and you and 

I will not assume I know anymore

I will not assume I know

I will watch bodies turn to ghosts

in the revelation that I do not know

and I no longer wish to pretend I do

I'm leaving control to those better at the reigns

power and kindness are not mutually exclusive

and my nerves feel like thorns
pressed against newborn flesh
and my eyes close to see my savior

Strangled

Take these thoughts
from around my heart
I can't breathe
I want to be free
of these ties

I keep looking back
and getting burned by all the
radio-active truth bottled
in fond memories
lies stored away in stories
meant to keep me acting a part
I didn't not ask to play

I do not want these things
but this mind
it's locked into the story
and can't set itself free

I am strangled
I'm twisted in this history
subdued in knots
looking to the silence
that whispers my hope

Wishes

If wishes were real

I would be able to 

look at the sky

and be blinded by light

If wishes were real 

I would be able to 

take my hand

press it to my chest

and feel the drums of Africa

If wishes were real 

I could look myself in the eyes

tell me a truth

that would make me cry

and set me free

If wishes were real

so would be 

my love

I keep thinking 

Silly as it is 

that love is like

a blanket

I can cover myself in

when I am afraid

I keep hoping love is

the Mother

that strokes my hair

and the Father 

that lifts me up high 

til I squeal

I keep wishing

love turns into 

spirit

spirit into flesh

flesh into man

and man into 

my life

If wishes were real

I would hear him calling me

from a far

I would feel his thoughts of me

I would always be in his presence

If wishes were real

You are

I am 

We be

and that would be all the wishes

made on falling stars