Bowed

I kissed your lips this morning
I touched the side of your face
closed my eyes
and reminded myself
of you

I touched your eyes
and prayed you see far
looking into things
bringing smiles and light
to your heart

I touched your lips with mine
and asked for your honesty
I asked for your thoughts
I asked for the things you
are too embarassed to share
they could never change the way I see you

I allow my hair to cover your head
I needed to remind myself
of your protection
I needed to speak my appreciation
I wanted you to know
what I always knew
you love

covering your body
I touched each place
with lips and eyes
I need them to become my friends
I need to know they could hear me
I need them to come forward in you

Holding your hand
I forget the pain of this life
I bowed myself before you
because you are worthy of my love
you are worthy of my praise
and you are every man I could ever want

Prison

Don't let me lay by the side
where the warmth hits the ground
I see the cold and shadow
Look around at the darkness
I lean on it

Darkness lets things grow
it brakes open what is locked
and lets the being be
Don't leave me in the light
it reveals death

Don't let the sunlight rise
where I am not finished growing
it becomes walls windows and doors
Let me be free in the darkness
like a child naked in the summer

These things in me are dying
I wonder what things they hold
ugliness reveals beauty
like seed reveals tree
and becomes flower and fruit
I am ugly
when will the tree in me brake ground

I am locked in this place
I'm learning its dimensions
depth, length, height and time
only show the way
something cosmic is judging
something eternal making measures

Will I be acquitted of this life
and be free to live again

Fame

Stoke it
prod it til the flames rise and fall like heartbeats
keep it breathing
seething and spitting fury
Poke it and watch it rise higher
power and dominion
watch them burn

they look
rubbing hands together
licking lips
like hungry wolves
dark flesh will be devoured
tears flow in fear
they are being stoked

Arms bowed
to receive the sadness
of women crying over babies
men crying over woman they couldn't love
children shaking in fear
they are hungry for a little justice
but she will remain blind

they stand straighter
because they are learning
what broken backs paid for
they will rise and reap
they will reap
all will cry

this is the fame that's won
when lives aren't left to live
when stars fall as angels
and become men of renown

Middle

I've been forced to stand this ground
I didn't chose it
in some ways I don't think I could choose
graffiti on the wall
drawn over words
layered over cuneiform
hieroglyphs and oral stories
I can't see an original thought
just sounds
turning to pictures
morphing into written words
all saying the same thing
from varying depths

I didn't choose this awkward stance
it was handed to me
trying to live in this world
is like dancing off beat to ill-timed music
I have no other choice
I want to dance

nappy hair
not nappy enough
skin that plays tricks and changes
not dark enough to feel proud of deep roots
never light enough to bring an ease to faces like its own
not enough black consciousness
too much white mindedness
and beaten up on both sides
I simmer in an anger I didn't make
and I try to ease it
by telling those who step on my toes
it's okay

they think I'm one of the safe ones
because I smile and speak
the easy way they reach to touch me
or stand too close in line
or the way they keep driving
when I have the right away when crossing the street
they don't know I seethe and watch how they ignore me


The others think I'm lost
because I listen to "that" music
or like "that" guy
or watch "that" movie
how can you ground yourself in quicksand
all the while they are trying to buy their way in
copycats of a culture that holds them by the neck
and they have the nerve to tell me
straighten that, wear this, get that, roll this
but they don't make it
or sell it
am I really the hypocrite here


I am playing a dangerous game of double dutch
the ropes are strung with mean words
I'm like too dark make-up
on too light a face
at my inability to match and blend in anyone's culture
I have impeccable rhythm
but can't seem to jump in without being hit
hit with words that expose my homelessness
I can't seem to find the middle
trying to jump in time with acceptance of myself
in a society with folded arms

Binds that Tie

Eva's hands were tied
when Mother
was pulled off the ship
and for her beauty
traumatised beyond knowing
seized in her fight to survive
and keep the blood of the womb
flowing for generations
she trained her young
in knowing ignorance
hoping they would wake
implanting songs from
other worlds and other lands
in her children's minds as lullabies

Her daughter's hands were tied
when the first master went into a house
shrouded in darkness
she did not give up her ghost
she gave up her mind
and hardened herself
as she was stripped of tatters
and patchwork
she left her tenderness on the ground
to rise in a power foreign to her nature
Her man stood helpless
He could not protect her

Her daughter's daughter hands were tied
the moment freedom rang
and integration was mistaken for assimilation
decadence gained
was ownership lost
and in the end all she came up with
was debt and desire for more things
dress, move, walk and talk like them
and you too will have made it into
the "Dream"
all the breeding back and forth
dark to light
light to dark
created confusions that made
the Mother's tears flow
The goal had been accomplished
her daughters were bound
unable to find the Mother in their land
they could not draw the scent of her footprints
from the soil they stood upon
they could not follow her back home

The line of the blood flowed
weakened
until a daughter was born
who looked back into the eyes of the first Mother
then to the eyes of her children
whose lines could not be drawn straight
lost
this daughter shook the blood in her veins
until it frothed
looking for the reasons her hands were tied
unable to find branches
she followed swirls
unable to pull the truth from her blood
she cried to the heavens

"If there is a God that hears
help me find the binds that tie
tie me to minds that keep me from
calling the earth
tending the sea
healing the sky
and living this life
and if there's not
may my eyes open to all the light
to honor the life I live"

Dreams and Roses

Don't give me roses
Again
I say
don't give me roses
I'd rather you give
a hand when I'm down
a word to lift my spirit
a partner for living
not for my dreams

I can't give
what I don't have
So I won't promise forever
eternity
or always
I will offer my best
but don't hide your worst
and let me do the same

Untangle yourself
from the layers of false patterns
Build me up with words
to feed my strength
and I will offer you praise
fit for a king

Don't try to make me happy
point me to the happy inside me
demand I excavate it
even without you

Don't give me diamonds
They fall as tears from the eyes of our people
Don't give me gold
it was stolen from our land
Give me the diamonds of truth
Give me the gold of peace

I'm awake
don't hypnotize me
with what you think I want
ignoring your own heart

I don't mind dreams
and roses
they are beautiful in stories
they are sufficient for graves

Finish This

Our fingers unlaced
we kissed
and I woke up

I look at myself in the mirror
I recognize the face
not the tears

Twisting unlocked roots
I'm reminded of the shame
in my heart
how these tight coils came to be mine

Strength and mental anguish
minds twisted and controlled
the desire to match sickness
to imitate a deficiency of soul

I wonder what I would have been
freed from visions and thoughts
of my own inferiority
based off a story told one to many times
feeding the depth of mind

Knowing how doesn't mean action
and action doesn't mean it's ever finished
I will take the reigns of my mind
from those who wish to drive me
over death

I want to make a finish
of the work done
long ago
in the line of women I follow
the first broken spirit
the first captured mind

I want to finish this
and bring them back to
their promise
the last shall be first